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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27876810">Fall Apart</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/'>Anonymous</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alpha Choi Soobin, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Bottom Huening Kai, Dirty Talk, Dubious Consent, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Huening Kai, Top Choi Soobin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 09:20:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,219</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27876810</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Alphas are collared by the government to maintain control over their wild natures and to protect omegas from their more violent counterparts.</p>
<p>That is, until the power grid fails.</p>
<p>Kai watches the horror unfold, dumbstruck, and then he remembers his Alpha step-brother...now uncollared.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Soobin/Huening Kai</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>142</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Anonymous</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Fall Apart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i'm going to hell for this</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kai knew about the Collar Initiative. Of course he did. He learned about it, like every other kid in the free world since the 1960s, in his high school freshmen history class. But even before that, he knew about it on some level. After all, his father and step-brother were both collared. He remembered the day that Soobin got his collar. He thought it had been a punishment at first—a really weird one, maybe, because it was a bit much, even for Seokjin—because Soobin had just gotten into a fight with their dad the night before. Not one of their usual fights, either. This one had been a knock-down, drag-out, teeth-bared, growling death match of a fight. Kai had watched, frozen for reasons he didn't understand, unable to interfere, as Soobin tossed their dad around the room like a rag doll, finally ending up on top of him, teeth clenched and bared, saliva dripping onto the older man's exposed throat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai had squeezed his eyes shut then, so he could never say for sure how his dad got out of it, but the next thing he knew Soobin was locked in Bobby's panic room, and the next day Seokjin went in and returned with a much calmer, chastised-looking Soobin, his older brother's head bowed in shame. The new collar, heavy-looking and rigid, just like Seokjin's, was secured around his throat. He looked uncomfortable and ran his fingertip between the material—some high-tech polyweave—for a moment before yelping and pulling his finger away like he had been shocked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So yeah, Kai knew about the Collar Initiative, and four years later, when he came of age and presented as an omega, he was grateful for it; grateful for the heavy, chafing collars that bound his brother and father, and every other Alpha on the damned planet. Because the Collar Initiative was the only thing standing between him and…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Well. He didn't think about that. Didn't think about what nature had made out of the person he loved and admired most, what science had managed to tamp back down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin, for his part, got used to the collar; wore it like a second skin. Or at least, Kai thought he did. He never fiddled with it, never strained his neck against it or gave any indication that he noticed he was wearing it. So there was no harm, really. And Soobin was back to the brother he knew before the snarling beast that had appeared in the kitchen that day, that had dominated and had nearly killed Seokjin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was only Kai's age at the time, his lack of scent, lack of a defined role, that had saved him from his newly-presenting brother. He knew that, but he didn't like to think about that much, either. Because Soobin before, and Soobin now—collared Soobin, he could never hurt Kai. Kai. Never in a million years. So the collar wasn't so much of a punishment, a prison, curse; it was a blessing, a gift that had returned Kai's older brother to him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So they grew up normal. And they learned to hunt. And Soobin protected Kai. And Kai let him, because at least Soobin wasn't trying to kill anyone anymore. Because it hurt Kai, as a brother and as an omega, to remember his older brother, though not by blood, his <em>Alpha</em>, suffered since Seokjin had died (though not his mate; he reminded himself of this a lot, especially the nights that Soobin went out and didn't come back to the hotel until late, smelling of booze and another omega), so out of control and violent, acting out of rage and with sheer brute force.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And if occasionally, in the hunt, when Kai was in danger and Soobin became more…powerful, more brutal, his scent wafting thicker through whatever space they happened to be occupying, that was fine, too. And if afterward Soobin had trouble returning to normal and maybe Seokjin had to adjust his collar, and maybe Soobin let out a yelp before some semblance of <em>human</em> returned to his icy blue eyes, well…that was okay; that was what was necessary. And if Soobin seemed particularly docile in the days immediately following, his head low and his cheeks burning with embarrassment, his proud Alpha posture broken, well…Kai tried not to think about that, either.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And when Kai's heats hit, Soobin saw him through those, never mating him, never dominating him, just holding him, keeping his scent and warmth close, enveloping him. And when Kai's fever went down and the pain and discomfort and the <em>need</em> ebbed and they could finally untangle their time-tensed muscles and shower and get back to the hunt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So Kai was content. And Soobin seemed fine. So the Collar Initiative could only be, in Kai's mind, a good thing, and Kai wondered why it had taken them until 2020, when Alphas and omegas had existed since the beginning of recorded history, to implement it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He couldn't imagine what it must have been like before…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Couldn't…until suddenly he could. Until suddenly he <em>had to</em>. Until suddenly that was <em>just the way it was</em> again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He was in their hotel room, field-stripping and cleaning their hunting weapons. Normally it was a task that Soobin completed. The Alpha seemed to find comfort in keeping the weapons, especially the guns serviceable, in managing the raw power and barely-restrained destructive force behind the tools. If Kai were a more poetic guy, he'd figure that they were some sort of metaphor to Soobin. Soobin was the gun's collar.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But Soobin had been injured on the last hunt. Nothing major. It wasn't like they were going after a vampire or another one of their enemies. No, this was a fae—a simple kill-and-burn. Or, it was supposed to be. Kai still didn't understand what had gone wrong. They had found the body; check. Killed it; check. Doused it in lighter fluid and lit the match; check. All checks down the how-to list of Kill That Thing Before It Kills Us that Kai kept in his head, but somehow it hadn't worked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They had just turned away from the location, planning to grab a drink to celebrate a job well done and then head back to the hotel to get some rest before continuing on the next day to the next job. Lather, rinse, repeat. Straightforward and easy. Supposed to be, anyway.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The next thing that Kai remembered was Soobin on the ground, his throat under Kai's hand, pushing down, <em>pushing</em>… "You're just an animal; always have been. Only reason I even let you stick around me is that <em>fucking collar</em>. I should put you down like the animal you are."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So it was Kai that injured Soobin. Fae had always been one for illusion and he fell for it. Lucky it wasn't worse, really. The force that Kai was exerting should've snapped his windpipe. But ironically that <em>fucking collar</em> had saved Soobin. The lack of give in the polyweave, the metal filament that let the punishing shock travel through it when Soobin's vitals arched too high, too fast, had taken the bulk of the force and Soobin was left with a sore throat, probably a bruised esophagus, and that was it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Well, physically, that was it. It would be a long time before Kai could erase the hurt he had seen in his brother's eyes from his memory.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Just an animal…always…that fucking collar…put you down.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The words still echoed through his mind, his own voice stabbing him through the heart. He looked over to the bed, where Soobin had flopped down as soon as they got back, turning his back to him and dozing off. Soobin was trying to act like it hadn't bothered him. Maybe it hadn't. Maybe, because this was how Soobin was, he agreed with what Kai said. That hurt Kai even more.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Because his brother wasn't <em>just an animal</em> without his collar, any more than Kai was <em>just a bitch</em> during his heat. It was a thought that nagged at him, at the peak of the fever, when his body was screaming out for an Alpha—<em>any</em> Alpha—to take him, claim him, fill him, fucking knot and breed him. But outside of the fever, he knew it wasn't true. There was a lot more to him than his omega status. Same for Soobin and his Alpha status.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The low light from the lamp beside Kai barely reached Soobin, throwing his body into a landscape of sharply-contrasting shadows, the changing light from the television throwing him into sharp relief every few seconds. Soobin let out a low growl that sent the hairs on the back of his neck bristling, and Kai narrowed his eyes, watching the rhythmic movement of Soobin's back. The Alpha was asleep, definitely. So, a dream?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He glanced at the television, his eyes falling on the headline sliding across the screen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>National Broadcast Warning</strong>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was repeated over and over again, and Kai could just imagine the shrill tone that would go with it if he hadn't muted the television in order to not disturb Soobin. His mouth went dry as he waited for the message to start. The states each had their own emergency broadcasts, as did most counties and even some cities. So for a message to hit the National Alert System…it had to be big. Like, the shit they had dealt with during the apocalypse big.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The screen flashed and a pretty anchorwoman appeared, her mouth moving silently. Kai's eyes focused on the scrolling marquee at the bottom of the screen, taking in its new message.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Power grid failure: Seoul announces a wide-spread failure in the power grid designated for the "Collar Initiative". All collars presumed to be failing. Citizens advised to avoid contact with or isolate Alphas. Assume that any Alpha is an immediate danger.</strong>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai reached for the remote, heart pounding as he hit the button to restore volume.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"—scenes of terror captured on film beginning at 8:37 tonight, just three minutes after the power failure was detected," the anchorwoman was saying, and Kai could hear a slight tremble of fear in her voice. "For safety reasons, our station has not dispatched crews to acquire live footage and we again urge you to stay in your homes and away from any Alpha pack or family members. We take you now to the footage that was sent in just minutes ago."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The video was shaky enough to make Kai nauseous, but it was nothing compared to the twist in his stomach when the camera stilled and zoomed, and the contents of the video were clear.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Chaos. Complete and total chaos. Kai watched as a young omega, no older than sixteen was pinned down by a much-larger Alpha, the collar blatantly absent from his neck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>Rape</em>. The word leeched its way into Kai's mind, slow and thick like mud. Kai was watching an omega, like him, get <em>raped</em> on the streets on the eight o'clock news.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As he took in the video, took in more and more details, Kai realized with a violent lurch of his stomach that it wasn't just one. The background of the video featured <em>multiple</em> Alphas mounting screaming, crying omegas. And one by one, each of them seemed to give up, go limp and complacent, resulting in a triumphant roar from their attacker.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Assume that any Alpha is an immediate danger.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai's head whipped around to look back at the bed, and his heart nearly jumped into his throat at the sight that met him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin was gone. In the space that he had previously occupied, Kai could see the familiar polyweave of his collar against the cheap floral motel bedspread.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai stood up quickly, trying to control his breathing, stepping carefully towards the closed bathroom door.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And if Soobin was in there? Then what? He wasn't wearing his collar. The collars had failed. Soobin was an Alpha. And Kai was to presume all Alphas were an immediate danger.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He considered grabbing one of the guns. But then what? Was he going to shoot his brother?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>No. He knew, no matter what, he couldn't do that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He took a deep, shuddering breath. He needed to leave. If Soobin had gone to the bathroom, he was giving Kai his chance to escape. Kai tried not to think of what was on the other side of the room's door, what awaited him outside. He had to grab his shit and get out, lay low, wait for this to be over.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He turned around—</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And found himself face-to-face with Soobin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Soobin—" Kai's voice choked off almost as soon as he started to speak. What was he supposed to say? What even <em>was</em> there to say in a situation like this?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin's lips twitched into a cruel imitation of a smile. "Kai."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai took a step back, his heart thundering faster when Soobin merely matched it, maintaining that less-than-six-inches cushion of air between them. Normally, Kai would protest Soobin's use of "Kai" instead of “Ningning” or “Hueningie”. Normally, Kai would push Soobin away from him, tell him to stop fucking around. Normally Kai would do a lot of things.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But this situation wasn't normal, and Kai was at a complete loss. He acted on instinct, reacting to the smell of Soobin—the smell of <em>Alpha</em>—filling his nostrils, and tilted his chin up slightly, exposing his neck. His instincts preened as Soobin's scent increased, his eyes falling to Kai's neck, while Kai's mind screamed at him that what he had just done was <em>wrong, so wrong, a very bad idea</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A low growl sounded from the back of Soobin's throat and before Kai could even register the movement he was being slammed against the bathroom door, hard enough to send a jolt of pain through his spine, making his vision swim for a moment.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin's hand travelled up from where it had pushed at Kai's shoulder, the fingers splaying to wrap around his neck, thumb pressed against Kai's windpipe and the other fingers spread over the back of his neck, tangled in his hair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"What was it you called me, Kai?" Soobin asked, his voice deathly quiet, the low, commanding timbre combining with his scent to make Kai want to agree to anything he said. "Just an animal? <em>A fucking animal to be collared?</em> Something like that, anyway." His thumb rubbed against the swell of Kai's Adam's apple, smirking when the omega swallowed hard. "All these years…all these years wearing that <em>fucking</em> collar, letting it change what I am… All these years protecting you… Just to have an omega—a <em>bitch</em> speak to me like I'm below him." He laughed, the sound not reaching his eyes as he studied his brother. "I'm gonna show you a fucking animal, Kai."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai had seen a lot of things in his life; had been scared shitless more times than he could count. He'd faced demons, witches, vampires…if it walked, fed, or shit on this earth, he had seen it, and each time he swore he couldn't possibly be more scared. Hell, he'd been at this his whole life—twenty-four long years now—and he still felt his heart pick up, his guts twist, on the occasional hunt. But it had been nothing like this.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai was actually terrified. About-to-sob <em>terrified</em>. Of Soobin. And that ludicrous thought coupled with his panic nearly sent him into hysterics; would have, if Soobin hadn't chosen that moment to hurl him violently onto the bed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He landed on his back, the wind knocked out of him, and before he could react Soobin was on top of him, pinning his body beneath his weight, his hands coming to grip hard at Kai's wrists, slamming them down on either side of Kai.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Thought about this before, you know." Soobin was talking again, and Kai tried to focus on his words; as long as Soobin was talking, he wasn't completely gone. He needed to keep Soobin talking. "Thought about taking you, <em>claiming you</em>, marking you up all pretty. Thought about it when you hit your first heat. Thought about it every time since. Thought about tying you and <em>breeding you like a bitch</em>." The last words were growled out through Soobin's teeth. "But that fucking collar…that fucking collar you love so much. You know what it does to me?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai swallowed hard. "It shocks you." His voice was small, fragile, even to his own ears. The voice of an omega trying to calm an Alpha.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin sneered. "Yeah, it shocks me. Shocks me any time I think about taking what's rightfully mine; doing what I have a right to do as a <em>fucking Alpha</em>. Well the fucking collar doesn't work anymore, does it Kai? So now I'm going to put you in your place. Show you that you're my bitch. Make sure you know that <em>you don't get to decide if I'm worthy or not</em>. That's <em>my</em> right. My birth right as Alpha. And I'm going to take it. So be a good little bitch and let me."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>With minimal effort, he flipped Kai onto his stomach, and Kai finally let out a strangled sob when he felt Soobin's fingers hook into his sweatpants, pulling them down along with his boxers to expose the omega's ass to the cold air. The Alpha's scent peaked again, probably in response to Kai's distress, and Kai felt his body begin to stop taking cues from his brain, his limbs becoming heavy and his head hanging down as Soobin guided him onto his hands and knees before pressing between his shoulder blades until Kai's chest was almost touching the mattress.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And maybe it was the Alpha pheromones that hung thick in the air; maybe it was some long-buried secret that Kai had carefully hidden even from himself. But in that moment, Kai realized that he wasn't terrified of what Soobin was about to do to him. He was terrified of the way Soobin was acting. Terrified of the out-of-control Alpha, not of getting fucked by his brother.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And deep in the pit of his stomach, Kai felt hatred and disgust for himself beginning to blossom, because he could feel it starting, slick beginning to pool in his body and seep out at the thought of Soobin—of his step-brother, his non-mated Alpha—fucking him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai knew Soobin could smell it; simple pack biology and physiology made that assumption a guarantee. But that didn't stop the burning shame from washing over him when he felt Soobin chuckle harshly and his brother's body slid down to inspect Kai's tight hole.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"See?" Soobin's hands gripped the cheeks of Kai's ass hard, roughly pulling them apart. "Such a good little bitch. Wet and dripping for me already, despite your fear." Soobin's thumb rubbed over the sensitive, puckered flesh and Kai tried, really tried to resist throwing his head back and crying out, tried to resist pushing his hips back to find more pressure from the digit. God, how he tried. But he failed. "That's right, Kai. That's how it's gonna work. I want it, and I'm going to take it, and you're going to give it to me because <em>I'm your fucking Alpha.</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And Kai knew, in that minute, that his brother was right. He was going to stay there and take it, because he was an omega—a bitch to be fucked by an Alpha—and that's what his body was commanding him to do.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin drew back and Kai could hear him moving around, undressing, and then there was something thick and hard pressing against his entrance and he knew, just knew that Soobin was about to—</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He screamed, his mind finally overcoming his body at the sharp, tearing pain as he was ripped apart from the inside and he struggled, clawed at the bedsheets, his legs working frantically to get away. Strong hands tightened their grips on his hips and held him still as Soobin's scent strengthened once more.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Stop." The voice was all command, low and thick, and Kai couldn't help but obey, his body stilling even as tears streamed down his face. God, it hurt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai had imagined his "first time" a lot over the years. The life they led didn't exactly mesh well with trying to find a mate, breed, and raise pups, but still, he had thought about it, craved it. But none of the times he had imagined had been like this. In his mind, his Alpha mate had been more…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We're not supposed to be tame little toys for you to fuck around with." Soobin was fully-seated in Kai now, but was remaining still, like he needed to say this before he commenced with fucking him. "But we're not supposed to be like this, either. This is what you did to us. Punishing us for our natures, humiliating us with those fucking collars. This is what <em>you made us into</em>."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was faint, maybe Kai was even imagining it, but it sounded like there was a pleading note in Soobin's voice, and that, even more than the physical pain of being split open with no preparation or care, finally broke Kai. He let his head fall to his forearms and nodded, letting out a nearly-silent whimper.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then Soobin began to move. He pulled back, nearly pulling out of Kai completely, and then slammed back in, bottoming out with a force that knocked the breath out of the omega and set his barely-calmed nerves on fire once more. He screamed, no longer trying to get away but needing to let out the energy that the pain sent surging through him. And still, under the harsh, overwhelming fog of pain and fear, there was a hint of <em>right</em>, of pleasure, of completion. Despite the pain, something in the baser parts of his being recognized this, <em>wanted</em> this, wanted to be tied with his Alpha. Kai's body flushed with shame when a small moan broke free from his throat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"That's right, slut." Soobin's voice was a deep, feral growl now, every other word punctuated by a deep, punishing thrust that hit some spot in Kai that had him twisting his fingers in the sheets, pushing back slightly against his brother's hips with a gasp. "You like it, don't you? Like my thick cock inside you, filling you up? Gonna like my knot even more." Soobin chuckled at the startled gasp that issued from Kai. "That's right. Gonna knot you. Mark you, too. Make sure that every other Alpha you meet knows that you're <em>my slut</em>."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin was no longer really thrusting, more grinding his hips against Kai's ass, his cock deep inside his brother. "This is how it's supposed to be, Kai. This is what we're supposed to be like. Both of us. That fucking collar isn't just cruel to me."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai thought about answering, wanted to, but Soobin's knot was swelling now and all other thought was obliterated as the Alpha tangled his hands in his hair, yanking his head back, and sank his teeth into the flesh between the omega's neck and shoulder. The knot was pressed against Kai's prostate, rubbing and massaging it, and Kai felt more full than he had ever imagined, more complete.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He screamed as he came, more slick gushing from his body, seeping around the knot and dripping down his thighs. He felt Soobin tense as he released the flesh from his mouth, a mighty roar breaking free from his throat as he came, releasing wave after wave of his seed deep inside Kai. Kai felt Soobin filling him, felt the wet warmth, and his omega cried out with joy, with the <em>rightness</em> of it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They collapsed, tied together, and Soobin positioned them on their sides, his arms wrapped protectively around Kai.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"No Alpha can ever fuck you like that when they're wearing that fucking collar." Soobin's voice was quiet, rough, muffled against Kai's shoulder, but the omega heard it just the same.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And for some reason, that idea made him sad.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>They were still laying there long after Soobin's knot subsided and he slipped free of Kai. Kai was afraid to speak, afraid of what kind of reaction his words might cause in the Alpha. They needed to talk, clearly. But well, <em>collared</em> Soobin hadn't been a huge fan of talking. Kai couldn't imagine how uncollared Soobin would react.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Stop it." Soobin mumbled, sounding half-asleep. He ran his hand over Kai's hip, down and back up, and it was a moment before the omega's confusion ebbed and he realized that Soobin was trying to comfort him with the touch. "Your scent. The fear is putting me on edge."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai nearly laughed. <em>His</em> fear was putting <em>Soobin</em> on edge? His step-brother had just claimed him, against his will, in a brutal and violent show of force and domination and <em>Kai</em> was putting <em>him</em> on edge?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Makes me think someone's threatening you." That sleepy mumble again. "Don't like it."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Soobin, are you for real?" Kai huffed and rolled over to face his brother, who loosened his hold for a moment to allow the movement before wrapping his arm around him tightly again. Kai surveyed the Alpha, the broad-shoulders and dark hair like his own, and the sharp eyebrows and bright icy blue eyes hidden behind fatigue-darkened lids.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You know I don't think all of that about you, right?" It had been bothering Kai since before…what he had said when the Fae had possessed him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Yeah."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Really."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Alpha stretched, releasing his hold on Kai as he arched his back. He settled back down and rested his head on his open palm, his lips twisted in a bitter smile. "I know. That Fae…it wasn't feeding off of your thoughts. It was throwing my own back at me, from the person that would hurt me the most if they said it."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai let this sink in. "You…want to die?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin scoffed. "No. If I wanted to die I'd've been gone a long time ago. It's more…" He sighed, shaking his head. "Wearing that collar…it makes you feel less-than-human. Like an animal who needs to be controlled. So after awhile, you start to believe it. You start to resent what you are." He searched Kai's face for signs of understanding and then sighed again. "You omegas and betas would never get it." He fell back, staring at the ceiling.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai was quiet for a moment, letting this information sort itself out in his mind. He glanced at his step-brother, <em>his Alpha</em>, for real now. "When you said that the collars are cruel to both of us…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin shrugged. "You liked being unmated, Kai? Empty all the time? Twenty-three years old without taking a knot? Not carrying even once?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Alpha was playing on Kai's omega instincts, he knew that, but still he felt the words land, felt the pit they seemed to open in his stomach at the thought of everything he was lacking.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"The way we move around… Never had time or…" Kai's flimsy explanations were cut off by Soobin's rough laughter.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"If it weren't for the collars, Kai, none of that would matter. You hate hunting, always wanted to settle down. If an Alpha could've mated you—not just taking you on the streets, but still really mated you—you could've had all of that a long time ago."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The last sentence jogged Kai's memory. "Those omegas in the streets…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"The fucking collars again." Soobin huffed. "Not right but, I mean what do you expect when you suppress an Alpha's nature all his life, then suddenly cut him loose, full-force?" He shrugged. "That's what I meant. It's cruel to build all of that up in Alphas, to force them to resist it, let it fester. It's also cruel to let an omega go their whole lives without <em>really</em> knowing their Alpha. Even the mated ones don't really know them if they're wearing a collar. And then if the collars go off-line…" Soobin waved towards the television, as though the footage were still playing. "It's cruel to make an Alpha live with what they did, or an omega live with what happened to them."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai frowned at the vulnerable edge that had crept into Soobin's voice at the end. "I don't hate you, Soobin."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You should." Soobin's eyes met him, and Kai could practically see the self-loathing swirling in them. "You should hate me. You should want to run away from me and never look back. But you can't. We're mated and you're stuck with me, and you couldn't leave if you tried."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai sat up, pulling his knees up towards him and hugging them loosely. "Wouldn't try." He reached out hesitantly, raking his fingers through his brother's short black hair. "I don't hate you for this, Soobin."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was a shrill beep and they both jumped, looking around. The sound repeated, every five seconds, until Kai finally located the source under the bed—Soobin's collar. He lurched at the sight of the flashing icy blue light along the inside of the band. It must be back online.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He sat back down, the collar clutched in his hand. He couldn't decide if he wanted to toss it out the door into traffic or just find some way to break it so that the beeping would stop. But he knew one thing for certain; there was <em>no way</em> he was putting it back on his Alpha.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"It's law, Kai." Soobin spoke as if he were reading the omega's thoughts. "The Collar Initiative instituted penalties for a presented Alpha not wearing his collar."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai's eyes locked on Soobin's neck, his chest tightening when he noticed, for the first time, the faint scarring that ran across the flesh from years of uninterrupted wear, shocks, and chafing at the skin. He shook his head. "No way."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ningning." Soobin's voice was gentle as though he were trying not to spook his omega, but it carried the stern undercurrent of an Alpha's command. "I have to."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I don't want you to." Kai's voice was thick, his throat tight. "Don't want you to be hurt anymore."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin sidled closer, his hand over the collar in Kai's now, and rubbed his face against his omega's. "And I don't want to lose you." He pulled back and took in the look of horror on Kai's face. "Didn't you learn the penalties in school? If an Alpha is caught without his collar, if he somehow manages to get it off, his omega is assumed to be in distress and danger and is taken from him."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kai's heart felt like it shattered into a million pieces. "So it's the collar…or me."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin nodded, finally pulling the collar from Kai's grasp. "And I don't know about you, Kai, but I'd rather go through life with the collar than without you."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"It won't be the same," Kai muttered, watching darkly as Soobin refastened the collar, covering the evidence of its abuse.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soobin knew what he was referring to. He shook his head. "Not usually, no." Then he flashed a mischievous grin at Kai before nibbling gently at his shoulder. "But if you're really good, Kai…next time you go into heat I'll let you take it off."</p>
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